Diabetes and my emotions (Part 1)

Blue flower

Blue flower

When I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes, I was:

  • Shocked – at the diagnosis
  • In denial – refusing to believe that a healthy, athletic woman like me could be diabetic
  • Angry – at what I perceived to be the injustice of it; I knew a lot of fat or obese people, whose idea of exercise was lifting pints of beer, who did not have diabetes, yet I had it
  • Guilty – that I could have brought it upon myself (well, media said so)
  • Scared – that I will end up a legless, sightless woman hooked up to a dialysis machine
  • Depressed and hopeless – if, despite turning my lifestyle around, eating well, keeping fit, losing weight and giving up cigarettes, I still ended up with diabetes, what hope was there for me to fight it and its complications? Why should I even bother?
  • Feeling alone – although my husband was there with me, as always, he was not diabetic.

I’m sure I went through other emotions as well. Based on other people’s experience, it’s natural to go through various emotional responses when you are told you have a lifetime disease.

As I came to terms with my condition and went through a roller coaster ride of emotions, the first major thing I realized was that I did not know anything about Type 2 diabetes. So, I went to  Amazon and bought a few books. I learned very quickly to separate the wheat from the chaff. One of the books I wasted money on talked about reversing diabetes – with the author’s specially concocted magic pill. I went online and encountered more junk. I could not believe how many claims of a cure there were, and how many snake oil peddlers selling “diabetic” supplements populated the internet. What’s more, I could not believe how many people fall for and continue to fall for their bogus claims.

But, I persevered in gathering information and accumulating knowledge, not just from my GP and endocrinologist, books, and websites of diabetes clinics, hospitals and doctors, but also from the Diabetes Online Community. I am a member of Diabetes Forums, frequently visit other diabetes boards and communities, and follow a number of diabetic bloggers. This year I finally joined Facebook and Twitter, and have become more involved in the DOC through them. I no longer feel so alone.

As a diabetic, I still deal with various emotions related to my condition, but after six years those emotions have evolved. (Stay tuned tomorrow for more.)

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5 thoughts on “Diabetes and my emotions (Part 1)

  1. fifteenwaitfifteen

    It is truly a roller coaster of emotions and feelings around dealing with diabetes. I’ve felt helpless and out of control so many, many times. Then, somehow, you suck it up, get your head together, and decide you will OWN your body, and not let diabetes ruin it. Just know one thing – you are never alone, now that we’ve entered the age of the DOC. (Hey, the internet IS good for something! 😉 ) We are all in this together, and we will do whatever we can to help, even if sometimes it is only to say, “I understand, and I empathize with you.”

    Reply
  2. Pingback: DEALING WITH DIABETES – One student describes her journey with Type 1 diabetes | TheNews.org

  3. Boyce

    I have been surfing online more than 2 hours today, yet I
    never found any interesting article like yours.

    It’s pretty worth enough for me. In my opinion, if
    all webmasters and bloggers made good content as you did, the internet
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    Reply

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