I had recently performed in a summer recital which my teacher mounts annually for her students. Although preparing for the recital can be stressful, I look forward to performing every year. This year, I was especially excited because I would be singing a really famous Italian aria which for years my husband had been asking me to learn. My excitement spilled over to what I would wear, what make-up I would use, and even to what color I would paint my nails. I actually had my nails done, something I’d never even bothered to do in the past recitals. I wanted to look my best.
I sang two songs, a French mélodie and the Italian aria. I was happy with my performance of the French mélodie, so I was all prepped for the aria. But at the last minute, as I’ve experienced before, nerves descended upon me and I mangled one of the most well-known arias in the world.
To say that I was disappointed would be an understatement. I was inconsolable, upset, and depressed. To lift my spirits, my husband suggested that we stop by one of our favorite bistros on the way home. Of course, I acquiesced. At the restaurant, I ordered something I haven’t ordered in a very, very, very long time – a plate of spaghetti. Oh, I also ordered corn clam chowder. Lucky for me, gâteau au chocolat was not on the menu. My husband asked, “Are you sure?” Yes, I was sure. I needed comfort food that evening.
I did not test my blood glucose after dinner, although I was tempted to do so. My thinking was, “Why destroy the warm, wonderful and comforting feeling which my high carb meal imparted to me by confirming what I know would be a high post-meal number?” I did check my fasting blood glucose the next morning, and was not surprised to see a high 135 mg/dL. But by morning, my post-singing depression had eased a little, so the high FBG did not depress me further. I knew I was not in danger of bingeing on pasta for the next few days. As always, testing reminded me that my diabetic body can’t deal with a plate of pasta and a bowl of corn clam chowder.
Now, I need to find another way of comforting myself should I mess up my next performance. But first, I need to decide what my next songs are going to be.